with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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