grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
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