i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Randomize
