so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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