This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
