I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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