literally had 100 drinks last night.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
its liver damage thursday
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