I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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