this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I wear drunk well.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize