dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
