Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize