You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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