Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
