did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
