theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
