She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
