do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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