While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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