It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Randomize
