theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
