the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
