Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
