That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
