There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
