I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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