We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
