If i come over, it means nothing
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
