talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
