i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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