All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
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