Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
