New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
