do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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