everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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