I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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