Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Randomize
