Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
