Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
im six kinds of drunk right now
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
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