i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
he thought i was a dude.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
