she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
