your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
