i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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