I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Randomize
