distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
