Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
