i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
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