5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
How's work?
Spinning.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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