Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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