i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
