i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
