How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
