i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Randomize
